Dear Janice, I began flat sharing with a guy a few months back and we immediately hit it off and are now a couple.

However, due to the rise in utility bills etc, he has decided to rent out the spare room to another lodger.

I agreed it makes sense as he has a room lying empty and it would mean we would have a bit of extra cash to go out now and then.

However, this new lodger came round the other night to view the room and chat to us, and there and then she said it was perfect and agreed to move in.

The problem is, she is drop dead gorgeous.

When she arrived, my boyfriend’s tongue (although he denied it) almost hit the floor and now I dread her moving in.

How can I go to work or leave them in the flat by themselves? She will no doubt be lounging about in skimpy clothes, and I can’t see how any man could reject her.

How can I get my boyfriend to choose another lodger?

Jane.

Dear Jane, just because you copped off with the landlord doesn’t mean this new lodger will.

You are getting way ahead of yourself here. How do you know she will even fancy your boyfriend? How do you know he will try it on with her? How do you know she’s not gay? Maybe she already has a partner and is perfectly happy.

There are so many unanswered questions relating to this poor lass, and yet you’ve got her bunked up with your man.

Prior to her moving in, meet up for a few drinks and get to know her better. You will be sharing the same living space, so best you know more about each other before she fully commits to lodging with you.

It is a bit of a worry that you are in a fairly new relationship yet at the first sign of a beautiful woman, you question your boyfriend’s loyalty. Just saying.

Dear Janice, should I leave my wife of 18 years and try and make a go of it with my one true love?

Recently the love of my life got in touch after 20 years. She is the only person I have truly loved so when she left me for another guy I was heartbroken. Apparently now they are split up and I have been given this chance.

If I’m honest, I can’t fault my wife, I love her in a different way and she is loyal, loving and kind, but we have never had any real passion together or had the “spark” or lust that I had with my previous love.

I am overjoyed that my ex has gotten in touch again, but now I have a really difficult choice to make. What should I do?

Mark.

Dear Mark, have you lost the plot? Seriously, why would you consider leaving a loyal and loving wife for a person who dumped you and ran off with someone else? It makes no sense at all other than to boost your ego and give you the trill of some added excitement in your life.

All the feelings of passion and lust for this female should have evaporated the day she dumped you. Trust me when I say that getting back together after all these years would be a huge mistake for many reasons, one being that you are both very different people now.

You have a commitment to your wife and have a loving future with her.

So, keep your lustful dreams as dreams, and put your efforts into the one person who deserves it.

Dear Janice, I have been living with my partner for eight years now (we are in our late 40s), but as I live in his house, financially I don’t know where I stand should anything happen to him.

I have brought up the subject a few times (after a few wines), but he says everything will be fine and that he will draw up something in his will so that I will be taken care of should anything happen to him. As far as I know he still hasn’t done it.

It’s not the kind of subject you bring up every day but for peace of mind I need to know what the future holds for me. How do I get him to understand where I am coming from?

Joan.

Dear Joan, you are right to be concerned because you need to know that you would still have a roof over your head should anything unfortunate happen to your partner.

Telling you he will sort something and knowing it has been put in place are two completely different things.

Have a last go at a conversation (without a few wines) and explain to him how insecure you feel. Tell him you need peace of mind and by showing you what he has put in place would remove a lot of the stress you feel over your future.

If he intends to include you in his will then there should be no reason whatsoever for him to withhold this information from you. If he does, and continues to stall, then going forward you need to put a financial plan in place should the worst happen.